Avoiding “Um” and Claiming “Writer”

January 31, 2013 By • 79 Comments
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I recently had the following conversation with some co-workers after mentioning that I was looking for inexpensive airfare to South Carolina:

Them: “Oh, what’s in South Caroline?”

Me: “A blogging conference that I’m hoping to go to in the fall.”

Them: “Oh. You blog? What about? Who is it for?”

Me: “Um. You know. Just life. And. Stuff.”

I am nothing if not verbose and descriptive. I really wanted to just smack myself in the forehead after that conversation. Why was I nervous about telling them what I write about? Why didn’t I mention that I happen to be a contributing writer for Allume, the conference I’m hoping to go to? Why was it awkward to say that I write about my faith, my family and my passion is encouraging women?

Nope.

Clearly I went with “Um.”

And I missed an opportunity to not only share with my coworkers a piece of my life that I am passionate about, but I missed sharing about Christ. I missed sharing stories of the amazing women I met in real life at Allume last year, of the incredible opportunities that have occurred because of my writing, and mostly? I missed the chance to claim my title as “writer.”

In my embarrassment of having to figure out how to explain what it is I do, I let my insecurity run the show. So I decided to take a minute to figure how to avoid it in the future. Trust me. This is not ground breaking. It’s been done before.

I developed an elevator speech.

You know, the “how would you present your blog/brand/job/goals/etc. to someone if you only had a short elevator ride to do it in” speech. 30 seconds, max. One or two sentences to say what you do, why you do it, and how it’s unique.

Here’s mine: “I write because I love God and feel called to encourage other women through blogging, with the hope of building community through shared stories of life, faith and motherhood.”

You, my sweet blogging friends? Claim your title of “writer” today and avoid the “um.”  I’d be blessed if you would take a few minutes and tell us your elevator speech in the comments – I’d love to read them!  

Crystal

Crystal’s heart is to encourage women through the written word. She is a full-time working mama dedicated to her family, pursuing God Sized Dreams & her jobs as a marketing/social media professional, (in)courage Community Leader Coordinator, & Raising Generations Today team member. Follow her on Twitter at @CrystalStine.

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79 Comments • Filed Under: Life in Christ, Writing
  • http://www.christian-momma.com/ LATOYA EDWARDS

    This is something I’ve been struggling with! Claiming the title of “writer”. Thanks!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Claim it, girl! It’s yours :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/cook.jennifer JENNIFER ERD COOK

    Awesome! I’m an “um” girl too. Praying about sharing the gospel more with those I meet too. It’s a hard thing to do, but we are called to show love…especially Him to others. :)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Praying for you Jennifer! That God would give you the right words in the right time :)

  • http://www.toodarnhappy.com/ KIM HALL

    Great points-that awkward feeling for me goes back to fear of failing, of folks thinking I’m weird, etc. Your description of how to describe what you do made me smile-I’ve done the exact same thing. However, I got tired of feeling like I was always on the defensive in regards to my choice to write. I have now developed an elevator speech. While I am more comfortable and confident when delivering it, I still get a fair amount of those “deer in the headlight”, “why in the world would you do that?” looks from folks, I think because they can’t imagine moving so far out of their comfort zone. :-)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      It’s definitely funny to see how confused people can be about blogging, especially after being in such great community here at Allume (where you’re my people! you get it!).

  • KIMBERLYCOYLE

    ‘Just life. And stuff.’ This is my elevator speech;) I might need to work on it!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      lol maybe just expand on the “stuff” part & you’ll be good to go ;)

  • http://twitter.com/TheMaryBonner MARY BONNER

    THIS is great, Crystal. I need to work on my elevator speech.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Thanks Mary!

  • DANIELLE @ MORE THAN FOR WALLS

    Wow so I needed to hear that today! I do it all the time. I don’t let the people at the office, or even family, into my blogging life. I made lip balm recently that I want to start selling but rather than give one out to a co worker labeled and pretty, I gave her a plain silver tin, why , because I didn’t want her to know I was a Christian blogger encouraging women to balance work and home and live a godly life.

    Shameful isn’t it? Thank God for his grace and mercy. and thank YOU for this post!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      You make lip balm? That’s awesome! So thankful for grace to try again each day and for a God who is patient when I just don’t get it the first….or 100th time…

  • http://www.natashametzler.com/ NATASHA METZLER

    I write about my farm, my faith, infertility and how God redeems pain. (not necessarily in that order).

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      {high five}

  • KM LOGAN @LESSONSFROMIVY

    This post is exactly how I feel. It’s funny I’ll claim the title “writer” or “author” in the online realm but in real life it’s harder sometimes.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      It’s definitely easier to claim these titles when we’re surrounded by people who get it!

  • http://twitter.com/ChateauPrairie CHATEAU PRAIRIE

    Well, since I am new at the blogging world, I should be a
    bit excited to say I’m a writer (with all my grammar mistakes- working on this).
    But to say to friends and family, well this is where I am still apprehensive
    and struggling. But if I am to live what
    my blog is about then I have to say….. I am a writer! Because this is who God
    created me to be. So I will grab some courage – throw off these old cloaks and
    practice saying- I am a writer! Whew….. not so hard…

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      You ARE a writer :D woohoo!

  • http://twitter.com/JenniMullinix JENNI MULLINIX

    I really needed to hear this because I always hesitate when people as about my blog. Love your idea about prepping an elevator speech. I’m going to try and work on that today!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Be sure to come back and tell us what you came up with :)

  • http://everyday-imperfections.blogspot.com/ JANELLE ALLEN

    LOVE this! Avoiding “um” is something I need to work on (and not just when talking about blogging). Why is it such an easy word to utter as a replacement for sharing about Christ and my personal relationship with Him? Great inspiration from you today – thank you!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Janelle! Oh my word I’m so happy to see a real life friend on here :) Love you!

  • DIANE BAILEY

    I think, sometimes, we feel like we are bragging on ourselves, instead of smiling and telling what the Lord has created us to do. At least, I feel that way at times. I write about women’s issues… and OH, do we have some issues, but I write about finding Christ in our Issues looking for Him in our everyday life!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Yes! “Finding God in our Issues” – love it :)

  • TONYA SALOMONS

    Ummm… I’ve been saying “Ummm” A LOT… and friend can I just say that I love what you’ve written here… I have graduate from “Ummm” to a hand over my mouth and a muffled “I’m a writer” – not the best but an improvement I’m sure. Here is my elelvator spiel…

    I write because it pleases God. My blog is the culmination of a dream to
    capture the essence of my story and my journey to understanding the purpose God has for my life. My hope and prayer is that these words will help others recognize the beauty that is their own story and find joy in Him.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      That’s beautiful! I love it :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1019771404 DEB ANDERSON WEAVER

    What? There’s a conference for bloggers/writers in SC??? I just clicked on the link and found out it’s only a couple of minutes from me! All my excuses for not attending these things may have just gone out the window…*frightened but hopeful breath*

    Helpful thoughts about the elevator speech. I suppose I could say that I write to share moments of beauty, faith, and joy in hopes of encouraging others. But then I’d probably have to actually sit down to write more than I do! I’ll need to work on this!

    Deb Weaver
    thewordweaver.com

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Hi Deb! Girl, if you can go to Allume, do it! You will LOVE it :) and you’ll make a ton of friends as a local (trust me, it was in my backyard last year and I met new friends by offering to bring their favorite coffee creamer!)

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1019771404 DEB ANDERSON WEAVER

        Thanks! I’m scared to death but really do want to attend… Will pray/work on making this possible.

        • http://www.amylearns.com/ AMY TILSON

          Crystal is right! This was a life changing weekend for me. Not so much in one big way, but in about 150 ways – the women I met there and the speakers! It’s not scary at all.

    • GAYE @CALMHEALTHYSEXY

      I am ashamed to admit that I don’t even know what this is, but I saw “in SC” and immediately perked up. Because we hardly ever get the good stuff in SC! I need to check this out!

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1019771404 DEB ANDERSON WEAVER

        Gaye, it’s a conference that encourages those who blog and who write. It’ll be held at the downtown Hyatt in Greenville in October. Do check it out! I hope to go!

    • http://ErikaDawson.com/ ERIKA DAWSON

      Hey Deb! I agree with the other ladies…such an encouraging time with women who *get* you and and what you *do*!

  • JESSICA N

    I am a new blogger – I feel like I’m more sharing my heart to a blank canvass when I blog. I write about parenting my youngest with an unknown special need, as well as what my Jesus is teaching me, etc. I’m actually scared to share with my family and friends that I blog. It scares me to have them see my heart. How do I get over this? http://jessnewland.blogspot.com

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Sweet friend, so glad you have an outlet though blogging to pour your heart on the page. It’s a hard balance when you know family will read what you write. Praying that God gives you the words to write and your family/friends hearts to receive with grace.

  • SARAH

    I have no elevator speech!! Um, I guess because it overwhelms me? ;) Thanks for the prompting to create one. I know it’s needed.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Don’t let it overwhelm you :) just think about what you write about – for me, it was just about planning ahead for the next time! (And….your elevator speech can change as you figure it out each time!)

  • DEE

    Love this…especially the “elevator speech” part. Thank you, Crystal!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Thanks Dee!

  • http://twitter.com/kikimojo KIRSTEN OLIPHANT

    My blog is a little random, so “um” might work really well in my case. But I totally DID develop a gospel in a mouthful kind of statement so that whenever there is a chance for that in conversation, I am not fumbling around and don’t use big terms. Not that the gospel can really be simplified, but I think it can be brought up clearly and concisely in the reality that Jesus lived the perfect life we can’t live and died the death we deserve so we don’t have to. (See what I did there?) I have more of it, if needed, but I have found since I developed a gospel “elevator speech,” I share it more and see places it fits in conversation more. Again–clearly the gospel is so huge that we could spend years studying it.

    But having a bite-sized, presentable sentence or two has really been great for engaging people and beginning gospel conversations.

  • http://dogfuranddandelions.com/ ELIZABETH @ DOGFUR&DANDELIONS

    Love this! I use my tagline and theme verse to share about my blog:

    One of my biggest passions is writing about God’s Word. And through my writing, my desire it to encourage Christ-centered living. I share devotionals, book reviews, and real life stuff on my blog that encourages others to “rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and be constant in prayer” (Romans 12:12).

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Love it!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/melissa.fields.wallace MELISSA FIELDS WALLACE

    Thank you for sharing! I know that feeling very well! :-) I have only shared what I am doing with a few close friends but they have all been so supportive. Their support helps me feel more confident and I hope it will help me share more. God is really working on me right now with part of my dream. I was scared to say any of it out loud but I finally told my husband last week and he thought it was great! I am trying to really process everything and write it all down. Hard to decide exactly where to begin.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      The highlight of my writing was when hubs super randomly last year called my blog my ministry. To have someone else see it that way was awesome!

  • DEBBIE (A MILLION SKIES)

    This is not my elevator speech but it reminds me of an awkward time at church, when the pastor had us turn around to someone we didn’t know, and tell who we are and what we do. When I introduced myself to this stranger (a man) and he asked what I “do”, I stumbled as I told him that I’m “just” a wife, mom, homeschool my kids, and write. His lovely reply “That’s it? You don’t have any hobbies?” Needless to say, I avoid him everytime I see him now!

  • KIM HYLAND

    I’ve struggled with this too. Thank you for challenging us to articulate it! Even doing it here is hard. It helped me to just answer your three questions, and then put it all together (we writers seem to want to get it RIGHT even as we write it!)

    What: I speak, write and blog at Winsome Woman
    Why: Because I want to encourage women
    How it’s unique: I share stories, insights and lessons learned from my life as a woman, wife, mother, and friend

    The “speech”: I’m a speaker and writer. I speak to women’s groups and write at my blog Winsome Woman sharing insights from my own experiences as a woman, wife, and mother in the hopes of encouraging other women in their lives.

    Thanks, Crystal! Now I’ll go practice :)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      {fist bump} love it!

  • http://www.facebook.com/jessica.stinson.94 JESSICA STINSON

    That story sounds so familiar to me. I did enthusiastically tell someone about my blog and the exciting opportunity I was given to work with the (in)courage community groups as an (in)courager. The response was, “Do you get paid to do that? I mean, that sounds like a lot of work.” Instead of tactfully explaining that my gain isn’t monetary, but treasures of another kind, I just froze. This girl who loves words did not have any in that moment. And then felt the guilt afterward for not saying what was in my heart. I love doing this and I LOVE the people I’m meeting as God leads me down this path. “Writer” is something I need to claim! Thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad to know even the best have those days! :-)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Oh girl! You should have been a fly on the wall the night I had to explain to my husband what I was doing with (in)couragers and then how it would be different when I started helping Stacey. Bless his heart…he doesn’t really “get it” but he supports me :) and he calls it “twittering” which just makes me laugh.

  • ALECIA

    I always feel awkward when people bring up the blog, I never bring it up, bc it feels too weird to talk about this part of my life. I’ve been doing it for over a year now and it’s become so much more than blogging-it’s writing and discovering a part of myself I never knew existed.
    Working on that elevator speech now! I need to start claiming this part of my life and be more confident to share it. Thanks for the encouragement to do this!!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Praying for you as you claim what God has given you :)

  • CHRISTY FITZWATER

    Thank you so much! I’m getting ready to make a one-minute video for my website today, about why I write, and I’m so nervous. You’ve totally inspired me to get in front of the camera and just say why I write -with confidence. THANKS!!!!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Come back and share the link with us do we can come cheer you on!

  • http://www.amylearns.com/ AMY TILSON

    How I’ve been putting this off… I write about all that I learn from motherhood, following Christ, and the fun random things of this life. Well, that wasn’t so hard. I just copied my header essentially. Imagine that! :) Thank you for always being an encouragement in your realness. I know your words before I see that you are the WRITER. Thank you for always being you.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Oh my word. Sweet friend, that was the ultimate compliment!

  • http://www.servingjoyfully.com/ CRYSTAL

    I have this problem! I don’t have a problem telling people what my blog is about when it comes up, but definitely have a problem claiming the title of “writer” especially when I have very little tangible published pieces to show for it. But at the same time, it is what God has called and gifted me to do and I feel like I need to claim that. It’s tough.

  • http://twitter.com/treatmetoafeast ROCHELLE WILSON

    Crystal,
    WTG! Claiming who you are in Christ is a scary thing, but we need to remember…he does not always call the equipped He equips the Called. You=Writer BEAUTIFUL!
    Keep walking in your dream, sister, I am proud of you.
    Peace and good

  • http://www.alifesurrendered.com/ MICHELE-LYN

    I never thought of an elevator speech before! My awkwardness usually comes when someone that I haven’t spoken to in years, and who hasn’t followed or commented — ever — says, “Oh, I read your blog. I know what’s going on in your life.”

    “Oh, really. I’d like to go find a hole to climb in now.” Seriously.

    I love your honestly. I love your heart. I am going to work on the elevator speech. :)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      lol oh hon, that’s how i feel about facebook. my former-pastor’s wife used to do that all the time. it’s very awkward.

    • http://www.toodarnhappy.com/ KIM HALL

      Oh, wow, Michele-Lyn. That would make me want to crawl in a hole as well. :-)
      I choose my words and topics carefully as I decide what is appropriate to share, but having someone say something like that makes me feel more exposed. . .

      I look forward to reading or hearing your elevator speech!

  • http://www.handmedowngrace.com/ JESSICA HOOVER

    This is a great post! Yes, claim it! Oh, and check on fares into Charlotte too. I promise to come and get you. It might be cheaper. We’ll talk, mmmmkkkkk?

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      oh my word, you’re right. would you really?!

      • http://www.handmedowngrace.com/ JESSICA HOOVER

        For you my dear…of course!

  • http://twitter.com/alyssaavant ALYSSA AVANT

    You work full time ?? I wondered if I was a lone wolf at that. I teach and this is my first year so I’m still trying to get used to that title, but I love writing and speaking and blogging!!!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      I usually feel like the only one as well, glad we could connect :)

  • http://www.girlwithblog.com/ ANNA R

    Elevator speech: I write with simple honesty on the joys & struggles faith, motherhood & the everyday. Pictures of a cute baby, a few recipes here & there, and always lots of feeling(s).

    It took me a few years to really nail down what I write, because I’m not a niche blogger, but I think I’ve got it now =) Love you friend!!

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Ah yes, niche bloggers. I’ve never been able to pick just one thing to focus on, which is probably why I end up with “um” more often than I should!

  • http://twitter.com/Missindeedy MISSINDEEDY

    Crystal! This was such a simple and helpful post. Thank you, thank you! And, I so hope to make it to my first Allume conference this fall.

    I am a late-blooming writer who writes about the mishaps of daily life with my quirky family and the grace galore that always seems to follow. And my deep sadness over the demise of the Devil Dog. (Just kidding about that last part. Somewhat.)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      “grace galore”…I love that :)

  • CAROLINA DIEZ

    Great post! I can’t seem to develop an elevator speech for my blog….but here it is
    I write to share my passion for running, knitting quilting, funny qoutes and videos and I write to share the highs and lows of raising teen girls.

    I am a writer!
    sewcarolinaknits.blogspot.com

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      yay!

  • JAMIE IVEY

    i have had this happen to me so many times. Claiming myself as a writer is a lot harder than it seems!

  • http://www.tammygrrrl.com/ TAMMY PERLMUTTER

    Great post, and great suggestion. My tagline is: “Invest in the Mess.” I blog about the messy parts of life and faith to help women know they’re not alone. Gotta work on that one a bit.

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Tammy, I love that!

  • http://twitter.com/hereami68 ANNA RADCHENKO

    Oh, goodness. I have such trouble with this. I think it’s because I still don’t know exactly what it is I even DO write about already?! I’m just starting out and am trying to find my voice… God has really been working on my heart the past couple of years… I feel like there is so much to say, but the words aren’t coming. Maybe He’ll reveal it sometime soon… :)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      Anna, I know what that’s like. I started blogging more than 3 years ago and it is only in the last year that I’ve felt like my writing is taking shape!

  • http://ErikaDawson.com/ ERIKA DAWSON

    ugh. I do this ALLLLLLLL the time and I ALWAYS walk away kicking myself. I need to practice that elevator pitch — commit it to memory and practice it. Hopefully next time THAT is what comes out. :)

    • http://crystalstine.blogspot.com/ CRYSTAL

      I’m with you Erika! I might have it written, but remembering to say it next time will be the true test!

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