A week or so ago, I started my day with Jesus, expecting to read a chapter or two, and I got stuck on this single verse.
Truth be told, I’ve been stuck on it ever since.
“…let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him…”
Lately, I’ve really been struggling with trying to figure out what my assignment is supposed to be.
I’m a mommy. I’m raising a toddler and carrying a baby who is supposed to make his appearance sometime in the next few weeks.
I’m a wife. I followed my husband to a new job, a new place, a new home. I’m working on making us a life here while he works to put food on our table each day.
I’m a housekeeper (not a great one, but still), a cook, a daughter, a sister, a friend. I have big dreams and little ones and honestly, I just don’t know how they all fit together.
I feel like I’ve always been told that there’s supposed to be one thing, you know? One thing that I am made to do, and if I do it, then I’ll for sure be on God’s path for my life. I’ll be living out the life He called me to.
But there’s always more than one thing for me. I don’t know that there’s ever been just one. Life is messier than that.
As I get older, and more things clamor for my attention and focus, I’m learning that the life He has assigned to me has less to do with the one thing that I am supposed to be doing, and everything to do with the One I’m walking beside.
Maybe the life He is calling me to has many parts. Wife, Mommy, Writer – they all matter. Some days, one will require more than the others. But every day, I have a Companion along the way. One who fills me with grace and strength to do the things He’s placed in front of me.
But, maybe, it’s not really about me. Not about who I am or what I do. Maybe it’s all about who He is, and what He does in and through us.
That life He has called me to? The one He has assigned for me?
It’s a life of relationship with Him, before anything else. It’s letting go of my supposed-to’s, taking His hand, and just walking forward, one step at a time.
Because at the end of the day, all I know for sure is that I’m called to walk with Him.