Confessions of a Twitter Adolescent

Confessions of a Twitter Adolescent @allume


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I’m not very birdlike.
I mean, seriously, the only feathers I have are safely tucked away in my down-comforter.

When my Mastermind Group decided to discuss our Twitter presence last year, I had to go dust off my account and click that “forgot password” button.

I decided to really work hard at establishing this so-called Twitter presence, which was a great ambition but completely comical since I didn’t have any idea what I was doing. All those # and @ signs meant so little to me. In fact, they mostly annoyed me. I would try to read someone’s status and BAM #@?! Which immediately made me think that all these tweeters really needed to watch their mouths. I mean, it was great that they substituted symbols instead of writing out the actual words, but seriously guys, learn to talk proper. Errr, tweet.

The good news for anyone else who is still sitting there cross-eyed from all the hashtags and @ symbols, you do eventually learn to read around them.



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I have this friend, Mandy, who is like, the awesomest tweeter ever. (Yes, I understand that “awesomest” isn’t a word, but you have to know Mandy.) I love reading her tweets. I love it when she goes to a conference and is constantly sharing tidbits of wisdom. (Hello, I pretty much stalked her Twitter feed during Allume last year. It was almost like being there!)

And I’ve thought (many times) “Oh, to be a grown-up tweeter like her!”

But, the thing is, I probably won’t ever be. I don’t have a smart phone and don’t see myself getting one in the near future. I don’t carry my laptop around with me (mainly because the battery dies in like 2.03 seconds). And, honestly, my farming life isn’t set up for being able to type out 140 character comments at the drop of a hat. (Well, I guess I could but then my phone would permanently smell like manure, which doesn’t seem like a good option.)

But I have learned to use Twitter.

confessions of a Twitter adolescent

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Oh, I don’t follow rules very well. And sometimes weeks or months go by with only my blog post tweets going up. (I know, I know. That is way bad. I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be like 20-80. 20% your promotion and 80% promoting other people or creating witty one-liners or asking thoughtful questions, or, well, something like that. Forgive me, dear followers. I’m not really as conceited as it may appear.)

And I tried to join a Twitter party once. Uhm. Yeah. That was a nightmare. We’ll just leave it at that.

I’ve come to a valuable place though. I’ve realized that I’m human.
And some humans can tweet pretty birdlike but I just don’t have that talent.

I try. I join in the game. But when my “tweets” come out sounding like an adolescent teenage prank, it’s okay.

I’ve learned to use buffer to spread things out (which is great because otherwise once a month my followers would have to wade through a whole slew of my favorite blog posts from around the web).

I’ve learned to do a little “chirp” now and then, asking questions, throwing out a Bible verse or two that helped me through my day and might help someone else.

And when I completely forget that Twitter even exists for three weeks at a time? That’s okay too.

Now it’s time for your confessions. Are you a Twitter baby? (i.e. you read this post and said, “Uhm… so, what’s Twitter?”) Or an adolescent like me? Maybe you’re all grown up? (If so, drop this novice a few tips, would ya?) 

Confessions of a Twitter Adolescent

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  • Bstar0306

    Confession: I’m a twitter ADDICT. I tweet and read tweets way too often for my own good…I just find people on twitter are way less dramatic and super nice compared to facebook. And people on twitter are super helpful! I can tweet: “Does this match? with photo” and tons of people will be like omg yes or no way try a blue!

    • Natasha Metzler

      Oh, I love it! :) My set up isn’t quite convenient enough for that but I can see how handy it would be. And I do appreciate how easy it is to follow or not follow people and quickly create a community. And if someone IS being dramatic, at least it can only last 140 characters. lol!

      • Bstar0306

        LOL yes :)

  • Christy Fitzwater

    Twitter baby. Thank you so much for this encouragement! I have a long way to go…

    • Natasha Metzler

      It’s quite the adventure. :) enjoy!

  • Beth Hildebrand

    Thank you for the laughs this morning…they were funny to me because I’m right there with you! Happy Easter!

    • Natasha Metzler

      so glad you enjoyed it. :)

  • Tonya Salomons

    Oh girl!! I laughed through this one only because it’s me your describing (minus the farmer bit) but Twitter?!? What’s Twitter? And I have to keep my comments to what? 140? Have you met me I’m a bit verbose (obviously) – but I’m so glad that I found Twitter. Despite the fact that I’m not very good at it (I tried TWO Twitter Party’s – at the same time – ONCE) – the community that I have become part of – a stalwart of sisters (and some brothers) has encouraged me and led me to places in my faith I never thought I would get to… So good on ya girl for becoming a Tweep… And now I’m going to find your handle and follow you!

    • Natasha Metzler

      Oh, my. I can’t IMAGINE trying two twitter parties at once. Ten points for even attempting it! :)

  • Barefoot Hippie Girl

    I enjoy being on twitter, and I use tweet deck to sort those I follow, and schedule tweets. I love to tweet scripture. It fulfills my goal of making my twitter feed less about me and more about encouraging others.

    • Natasha Metzler

      I love the Scripture verses that come through my feed. Something I can identify as clear truth in the midst of opinions.

  • Mary Bonner

    I love this!! I can SO relate. I’m going to leave it at that! I think that’s 140 characters or less!! :-)

    • Natasha Metzler

      Ha, ha, Mary! Good job. :) I’m getting better but I still sometimes get cut off right in the middle of a brilliant thought.

  • Heather H

    I dusted off the never used twitter account 2 months ago. It’s a steep learning curve for sure. Whenever I try to fly and flop now, I’m going to remember this… I’m simply an adolescent tweeter learning to fly. Falling comes with the territory! {says the girl who forever seems to use # instead of @ or vice-versa.}

    • Natasha Metzler

      Oh, Heather, this made me laugh! I usually can’t remember people’s twitter handles so I start typing them and then get all confused, go hunting, then finally give up and just delete the tweet.

      I often tell people to start conversations with me first so I can just hit “reply”!

  • Abby Talsma

    Love this! I, too, am a twitter adolescent. Sometimes I throw in the random @, but mostly only if I have retweeted something. Hash tags are still this foreign entity that I may one day figure out. We will see.

    • Natasha Metzler

      Hashtags just crack me right up. On one hand they seem all important and necessary. On the other hand they are completely random and bizarre.

  • Elisa Pulliam

    Love the humor, transparency, and encouragement in your post. And I’m not sure where I fall in my Twitter age. Hopefully, still growing!

    • Natasha Metzler

      Thanks, Elisa. I hope the same for myself. :)

  • Janelle Marie

    I’m still trying to figure out the whole twitter thing myself and I’ve been on twitter since 2007.

    Janelle Marie

  • Amy Tilson

    This was hilarious! I especially like the part about farming and a phone constantly smelling like manure. That would completely be a #firstworldproblem (just for you). Just do your own thing and know that I’m thankful you and many others live on dairy farms so I don’t have to. I think I may tweet enough for the both of us. :)

  • Rebekah Ellis

    Thank you for this! I’ve just been (as in the last year) getting more serious about my blogging and have joined one of the (in)courage groups for writers where we’ve been talking about postings, and Twitter, and Facebook, and scores of other ways to build an audience, build a presence and share what God puts on our heart. As much as I enjoy technology and social media, I think I’ve looked at Twitter with about as much joy and anticipation as the prospect of going back through Junior High. I’m not even a Twitter adolescent. Is there something even newer than a Twitter baby? That would be me. But this gives me hope! You’ve encouraged me.

  • Lorretta Stembridge

    Oh my Wow! I will never forget trying to figure out the whole #thing! Thanks…this is very encouraging..and a good reminder that it’s a push for community presence not self-promotion.