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I Am a Writer

By

 

I want to share a small piece of my world. As small bloggers, we need to be reminded of the fruits of faithfulness, how little we are in control, and how much God is in control. 

I am thirty. I have lived a life surrounded by the mundane for the past thirty years. Until now. I have been praying for deliverance from mediocrity for at least ten years and these past few months the Lord finally pulled the scales off my eyes and let me see all the work he has been doing in my heart without me ever realizing. 

I have always felt the call to write and speak for the glory of God but have denied this calling. Instead I stayed trapped in fear and shame, assuming that it must be my sinful ego calling me to greatness. It was not. It was the call of God on my life.

And he has graciously opened my eyes to it.

I committed to Jeff Goins’ fifteen day challenge because it happened to coincide with a fast that the Lord had already called me to through Logan @ Allume. Thinking it was coincidence, but hoping it was his sovereignty, I agreed to accept the challenge. I bought Goins’ e-book and began reading.

Each subject that Goins wrote about had already been placed on my heart by the Lord. In the spirit’s own unique way, before ever reading the words of a man I had never met. When I opened the book, it gave me assurance that I was indeed hearing the Lord’s voice.

I can’t tell you how many times I laughed out loud in wonder at the goodness of the Lord in my life – through the words of someone else. If the spirit could do it through him, why not through me? 

For two years I faithfully and sporadically stewarded my mediocre blog, pokily waiting to be noticed. God’s providence and timing provided me with confidence to finally grab what’s been waiting there the whole time.

I called myself a writer. I did it loud and I did it over and over until it felt a tad less awkward. I have been doing it confidently for a month now. 

I have four kids under seven. My husband is a pastor and in seminary. I don’t have time for hours of networking and commenting on everyone’s sites. But, I just checked my blog stats and I’m shocked.

In one month of intentional submission to God, with little effort to gather fans and feedback, my traffic increase points to God’s harvest, not mine.

I went from 443 visits/ 247 individual users / 606 page views  to 824 visits /424 individual users / and 1721 page views. IN ONE MONTH. 

I’m a newbie and I recognize that I have a ton to learn. But this is pretty supernatural, is it not? You deserve to see some of my fruit, in case you haven’t noticed your own yet. It has to start somewhere. 

God is awesome. I am not. 

Lindsey Carlson is the wife of a worship pastor and mom to four under seven – Mad, Collie, Joodle Doodle, and Spence. She loves to write, sing with her husband, and pick up the occasional free-lance photography gig. After eight years, she has finally come to grips with the fact that she is an official Houstonian. She hides from the unbearable heat and humidity as she documents individual steps of faith in pursuit of a lifetime of faithfulness. Follow her journey at By Faith The Carlsons. 

Comments

  1. Hi Lindsey! I went through Jeff’s challenge too, and got so many great tips. I especially loved the way he started the series by making us verbalize, “I am a writer.” There really is something powerful in giving voice to that. I confess that I struggle with a lot of things “as a writer” (because I AM ONE!) — insecurity, distraction, lack of discipline… I hope somebody out there will “amen” that so I’ll know I have company!

    What a joy it is when I finally sit down and listen, and be able to put His message into words. You’re so right: God is awesome. We are not.
    Hugs from VA!

    • Hooray! I know, it’s crazy how just calling something as it is provides confidence to persevere! Many are the struggles of the writer’s afflictions. His grace is sufficient! In our weakness, He is strong!

  2. Thanks for sharing!  I have experienced your same fears!  I have felt called to write, but at the same time, have worried that it’s ME, even though deep down I really feel like it’s God’s calling, and not my ego…there is still that voice of doubt. 

    I experienced a similar thing back in May.  I read a post here by Courtney from Women Living Well (really what led me to the allume blog to begin with), and she mentioned the common sense thing of having her quiet time each day BEFORE touching her blog.  Now, I was reading my Bible, don’t get me wrong.  But sometimes I was eager to get to my blog stuff asap while there was a semblance of quiet in my house with 2 boys.  But her words made me think about that, and about the importance of getting in the word FIRST before I touch my blog in the morning.  So, the next day that’s what I did.  Literally that same day, my blog traffic increased by 33%, and the ONLY thing different I did was to read my BIble and devote my day to God before touching my blog.

    • Agree whole-heartedly.

      When the Israelites griped about Manna and begged for meat, God answered their prayers by giving them meat. Sometimes we think we need more blog traffic when what we need is more of Jesus. God gives the traffic (meat) to increase our faith to ask for more- but it’s always about developing more faith and trust in the Lord. It was never about the meat. 🙂 

  3. I’m 43 and all I can say is “ditto” and amen. I don’t want to be big…I want Christ to be big in my smallness so that even if one post, one phrase or one word touches one heart for Him….that’s satisfaction for me. Thanks for being out there too!

    Lorretta
    dancingonthedash@wordpress.com

    • Many, many, many prayers are the demands of those in public arenas! We are called to be guarded for our sakes and the sakes of those we are seeking to reach!

  5. Lindsey- I love this!  I’ve been looking for it since you mentioned it last week.  Thank you for sharing your heart!  I’m not yet at a place where I say I am a writer…maybe I need to think about that.

    • Melanie…yes, you SHOULD think about that…in my humble opinion. A good friend recently told me that writing is the way that writers pour Jesus in, it’s not all about pouring out!

  6. I did the writers challenge too. It was definately work but it was also good. Don’t think the readership increased a bunch but that is ok, what matters is my discipline for writing increased and I learned that topics are good ‘beginnings’ rather than just ‘writing’.

    • Readership is only one kind of fruit! God’s plans are so much larger than the numbers of readers or clicks. His plan is eternal and immeasurable! Keep look for the fruit and ask him to reveal it to you!

  7. I am 46 and just began blogging about four years ago.  Although I was never one to worry about stats much, it’s nice to know when your words are helping to encourage and change lives.  Above all, I want always to bring Him glory and honor through my blog.  Thanks for sharing your journey!

    • Barbie, “Ain’t no mountain high enough!” You can’t keep God from using you when you’re seeking to glorify him in all you do! And I totally agree that words of encouragement are nourishment to the soul! Thanks for nourishing mine today.

  8. Love your writing style. 🙂 Will be visiting your blog! 
    And thanks for reminding me that God is awesome and I’m not. 🙂 

  9. This is so good. I’m constantly checking to make sure I’m not wanting to grow my blog just for self but that I’m doing so because of an honest desire to spread the good news about God. Looking at all the how to tips for growing a blog can be disheartening sometimes. With three kids, a husband and full-time job, there just doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day to do all things I’m “supposed” to be doing. Thank you so much for the reminder that all I really need to do is focus on seeking God first and foremost, and he’ll work out the numbers and traffic.

  10. Kacey, I know your PAIN. As if we aren’t judged enough already as mothers, now add that you have this passion burning inside you to write. Oh wait, you don’t have to because you have it too. That’s nice.

    I pray to remember how much I prayed for God to give me the calling of “wife” and the calling of “mother.” I don’t want to throw them out over the next best out-of-reach calling. I want to value them in the right order, but sometimes that’s very confusing! I think that’s normal because it keeps us constantly in a need for grace!

  12. Lindsey, it is such a treat to read your words here. I am happy for you and pray that you will continue to listen to God’s call.

  13. Lindsey, I loved your post.  What an awesome story you have…you go girl!  : )  I’m off to visit your blog!  (Oh, and I’m a beginning blogger…but Jeff’s challenge really changed my thinking too.)

    • Christine, Thanks so much for your encouragement. I’m just trying to figure out what my story is! Congrats on starting your journey. May your steps of faith deepen your trust in God day by day!

  14. Lindsey, so glad to see your blog here.  I’ve been enjoying your writing for a while now. You are dear to my heart. May you continue to listen to God’s heart for you.

  15. Lindsey – wow, so so encouraged by your humility. I think we forget this too often: if God wants to do something through us, whatever it may be, He’ll make it happen, so long as we are humble and obedient. Congratulations and so great to see you boldly praising Jesus. Yes, God is AWESOME!

    Ian

    • Humility is so illusive! The second that you think you’ve figured it out, pride rears its ugly head again. I find that the only way to escape it, is to continually point all glory and marveling towards God! Thanks for stopping by!

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