I’m an overachiever.
In High School I was a Varsity cheerleader, the star quarterback’s girlfriend, Student Body President, hot on the heels of the Valedictorian, and voted Most Likely to Succeed.
And I loved it.
At Auburn University I quickly found my place as a student leader in a large Christian organization on campus where I eventually served as a Student Staff member. All the while I kept up my grades and earned the Chemistry student of the year for the Junior class and graduated Magna Cum Laude.
It all thrilled me.
There is something inside of me that continually wants to be successful at whatever it is that I set my heart toward. Whether it be grades, a home business, blogging, or parenting, I am an idealist at heart, and am driven toward the achievement of those ideals.
How My World Was Shaken
While I do believe that this is a God-given drive, and one that can be incredibly honoring to Him, I’m afraid that I have often used it for my own glory and I’ve found my world centered around who I am in the eyes of others.
Eight years ago my life as an over-acheiver changed forever with my first pregnancy. From the first moments of morning sickness I was limited. I could no longer achieve what I could before.
Over time, motherhood eroded away at my ability to achieve. I found my days consumed with details I could not control. The loss of control left me feeling that I could not succeed.
I found it very hard to feel significant while stuck at home changing dirty diapers.
I could not find success in my “achievements” at home—keeping the house clean, feeding my children well, or not yelling at them—because I ultimately failed in those never-ending efforts.
At times I felt worthless.
How to Be Irreplaceable
At the heart of every woman is a yearning to be seen as valuable, unique, and irreplaceable—whether it be in the eyes of her father, husband, co-workers, or friends.
We all long to be precious.
In our efforts to be special and loved, it is easy to get caught in the trap of appearances. When our appearances can not be controlled, a crash of our world is bound to happen.
There is an interesting word used in part of our passage this week, adorning.
Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
(1 Peter 3:3-4 ESV)
The original Greek word used for adorning here is “kosmos”. It is used almost 190 times in the New Testament, and all but two of which are translated into world.
If we go back to verses 3 and 4 and input “world” where we see “adorning” something interesting comes forth. We see a fuller picture of the command given. We are to not let our external appearance be our world, but let our world be set on what is internal.
My world is set on the external much more than I would like to admit.
What a Beautiful Soul Looks Like
In our pursuits of setting our world on being inwardly beautiful, we are given two characteristics from Peter of what a beautiful soul looks like—gentle and quiet.
The word gentle here means meek or humble. The woman who’s focus is toward a humble heart, is a woman who is precious to God.
And then there is quiet. If you are anything like me, you may find this a challenge. I’m not sure that the word quiet has ever been used to describe me! Thankfully, this characteristic has little to do with the volume of our voices.
The meaning here is peaceable, or tranquil. The soul that is precious to God is the one who is able to be at peace.
If worry and anxiety rule our hearts, the peace of God can not rule. We are promised in Scripture that if we choose to let worry go, the peace of God will guard us. (Philippians 4:6-7)
Yet, I AM Precious
The best news of all, is that even on our “loudest” anxiety-filled days there is hope. When we miss the meekness boat and sail through our days in a vessel of pride, we are still precious to God. And when we are more concerned with adorning the external, instead of making our world all about reflecting Christ, we are still precious in God’s sight.
Jesus already lived the perfectly humble and peace-filled life for us, and as we live our lives out of an overflowing gratitude for all He has done, we will emulate His example of a humble and quiet heart.
What is your world centered on? The external or the internal? Are you able to be at peace, regardless of what comes your way? Let’s chat about it in the comments.
Leave a comment and let us know what God revealed to you in this week’s study.
Struggling with Spending Time in the Word Daily?
Watch this:
Lindsey Carlson says
July 4, 2012 at 7:53 amKatie. I am loving you more and more each time I read words and then realize they were posted by you. I get your heart in a big way. This hit me right where I am today. I needed this word from the Lord. Thank you for pointing my eyes back toward Jesus.
I have struggled through a very similar season of challenge. I have spent the past eight years pregnant or nursing four different babies. You hit my feelings of worthlessness on the head. I would not have equated the two. Now I am finally in a season of normalcy and it is so exciting that it tempts me to return to the same root sin or pride.
It feels so good to walk in the freedom of Christ, no longer bound to the chains of legalism and fear – I do not ever want to go back. Thank you for speaking words that remind me not to pick up a different link of the same old chain. Grace to you, Katie!
Katie Orr says
July 4, 2012 at 8:54 amThank you for sharing your heart with us, Lindsey!
Motherhood is incredibly humbling and sanctifying journey, isn’t it?
So thankful He is speaking to you through this!
Debbie says
July 4, 2012 at 10:55 amLove this post. I can relate so well to what you wrote about achievement and motherhood. Right here and now! Thank you for sharing these soothing words…
I loved the portion of Scripture referring to conversation without using a word. Its easy to think of conversation as talk between people. But it really means the WALK not the talk!!! The picture in this passage made it so very clear and made me think more about the conversation of my life as I live it. Really great passage!!!
Katie Orr says
July 4, 2012 at 2:08 pmThis is such a rich passage, isn’t it?
Powerful image of how God can use us as we seek to honor Him with our lives!
Diana says
July 4, 2012 at 11:51 amThank you for posting this – it really speaks to my heart – Even as a grandmother – I long to be precious, and tend to look for that in kudos from friends. 1 Peter 3:3-4 is my new life verse!
Katie Orr says
July 4, 2012 at 2:08 pmI am so glad God has used this to speak to you, Diana!
Christina Lang says
July 4, 2012 at 1:24 pmI can relate with you. I struggle SO MUCH with this. I call myself a recovering perfectionist. Let go, and Let GOD.
Katie Orr says
July 4, 2012 at 2:10 pmOh, perfectionism. It is such a struggle! Thankful He is faithful to work in our hearts so we can walk away from it.
Kerry @ Made For Real says
July 4, 2012 at 2:43 pmI’m extremely grateful for your video today. I just struggle, struggle and struggle some more with the scheduling of my time. I talk a lot about how hard it is to find that delicate balance. Challenging! Especially with a husband in ministry (all of us in ministry) – I literally have to lock myself in my room to get quiet time sometimes. And that still doesn’t mean it’s uninterrupted!
Peace is a big one for me this year. Striving for that. In my women’s Bibke study at church I’m finding that many of us are not opening the doors to receive true peace in our lives from the Prince of Peace. When we let go of controlling He promises that peace. Love this truth. Staking ‘my world’ on it.
Tara Bradford says
July 5, 2012 at 10:07 amI’m in a stage of being at peace despite the external variables that are thrown my way on a day to day basis. We have an adopted son with attachment disorder and there is daily conflict in our home. I end my day more often than not feeling quite defeated and frustrated that our home does not feel peaceful and I failed at being a peacemaker. I know this is a season and that God is with me every step of the way, it just feels hard sometimes to find His peace in the midst of anxiety and challenges. I have my quiet time in the morning before kids are up and I feel ready for the day, but it quickly dissipates. I have a few verses that I read each day a few times, have worship music on in the car, throw up prayers as our day progresses, but I am so challenged by hearing and feeling God in the “noise”.
How do you all keep the peace that guards your heart in the midst of daily challenges and noise?
If you are able to add our son into your prayers, I’d be so grateful! Thanks friends! 🙂
Katie Orr says
July 5, 2012 at 6:12 pmOh, Tara! I am sorry to hear of your struggles, yet I know God has purpose in it all.
I’ve not dealt with your specific situation, though one thing I think may help is Scripture memory. I immediately thought of Phillipians 4:4-8
“4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”
Katie Orr says
July 5, 2012 at 6:18 pmI have found that dwelling on the Word throughout the day helps keep my mind full of truth, instead of drifting toward the negative.
Life is still hard, and having peace doesn’t mean there is not conflict or difficulties. But we are promised that our hearts and minds will be guarded by His peace as we trust Him with our struggles.
Lord, we pray that Tara will experience your peace today, even in the difficult situations. Be her strength. Help her to cast her cares on you, because we know you care for her!
Amy Bennett says
July 5, 2012 at 3:37 pm“We are to not let our external appearance be our world, but let our world be set on what is internal.” <– this! I just did a post about this verse last week and wow, seeing it differently even now.
Kristi says
July 5, 2012 at 6:43 pmSuch wise insight Katie!! I see you smiling as you type this, being reminded of how precious you are to Him!! You are a gift :).